#032 Are you sleeping?
“When did you write this?”
After a fierce battle, Kang Ba Da eventually grabbed the writer’s note. She looked at her notebook with interest and asked questions.
Kim Ha Neul put his face in. The glasses are broken, so it seems difficult to recognize your handwriting unless you look at them very closely.
“But aren’t you coming too close?”’
Perhaps because there is nothing to see, there is no hesitation in approaching the nose. Thanks to this, the skin of each other is unintentionally touching.
Of course, I don’t intend to make it obvious here first. I didn’t hate this situation, and I wanted to hear more about Kim Ha Neul.
“Oh, this was when I was in my second year of middle school.”
“How do you distinguish that?”
“We usually go in order of pages, but you can see exactly from the picture next to it. The front page and the back page are completely different, right?
Kim Ha Neul’s writer’s notebook detailed all kinds of worldviews, as well as settings and plots for various characters.
Kim Ha Neul seemed to estimate his age at the time by looking at the level of the painting drawn next to him.
“The handwriting doesn’t change noticeably with age, but the painting style changes significantly. I don’t use author’s notes that often either.”
“I see. That’s amazing.”
“Now that I look at it, there are a lot of ridiculous thoughts. There are so many creative ideas.”
Kang Ba Da nodded and looked at Kim Ha Neul’s side face as if he was possessed by something. I think it’s attractive to see him frown while concentrating.
“Since when did you want to be a writer?”
“I don’t know. Is he in the 8th grade?”
“Common 8th grade syndrome?”
“Well, it’s similar.”
Kim Ha Neul smiles lightly. Naturally, Kang Ba Da, which expected a counterattack, flinched at the unexpected response.
You’re getting hit by nothing!’
Thud, thud thud, thump!
Recently, the heart rate has become too frequent. I think it’s a heart disease. If it wasn’t just in front of Kim Ha Neul, he would have gone to the hospital first.
Kang Ba Da decided to ask questions that she had been curious about while trying to calm her excitement.
“Why are you writing, Ha Neul?”
“You’re right. He’s good at sports and cooking. I was wondering why you chose the job of a writer even though there were many other ways.”
“When I was having a hard time, fantasy novels were my only support.”
Kang Ba Da tilted its head to the answer without any hesitation. Then Kim Ha Neul smiled awkwardly and continued.
“When I was in school, I couldn’t judge why the children hated me or whether it was because I was bad. My personality was kind of crazy, so I just fought to death.”
“At that time, my only friend was a fantasy novel. I gained strength from watching the main characters in the novel, and my own values were created.”
Unlike before, Kim Ha Neul replied with a rather serious face. He must have thought a lot about this question himself.
“How did you start writing?”
“That’s a little embarrassing to say.”
“So I’d like to hear more.”
“Do you think I’m going to talk quietly?”
Kim Ha Neul provokes with a mischievous smile. He looks as if he’s “So what are you going to do?”
Seeing that, Kang Ba Da’s desire to win was on fire. It completely suppressed the shame and woke the beast who was asleep inside.
“You should try it, too.”
When Kim Ha Neul called her “sister” before, Kang Ba Da went over perfectly. She’s been planning revenge ever since that day.
The determined Kang Ba Da leaned. The distance between two people approaching in an instant.
The moment Kim Ha Neul flinched and tried to step down. Kang Ba Da grabbed him by the shoulder and whispered quietly.
“Are you sure you won’t tell me? Oh, paper.”
Kim Ha Neul’s neck snapped and went back as if it had been buffering. He opened his eyes wide as if he didn’t believe it.
“…Don’t do that.”
Kang Ba Da was blinded by Kim Ha Neul’s reaction, which was completely contrary to what was expected. Is it because you’re embarrassed?
“Ha, don’t do it!”
Kim Ha Neul opened the street and gently stroked my arm. a chilling reaction Kang Ba Da pouted at the sight of it saw it.
“Is it that weird?”
“Oh, my. No way. It’s because I’m not used to it. I’m not used to it.”
Kim Ha Neul makes an excuse belatedly.
However, it was not Kang Ba Da that would not notice the lie. Unlike him, it’s strange to say the same thing twice.
Kim Ha Neul turned his head in the hot gaze of Kang Ba Da. Looking at the innocent wall, he began to count the clouds drawn on the wallpaper with his eyes.
You can’t even see it properly because of the glasses. When I reached that point, it was a Kang Ba Da that I couldn’t even show that I was upset again.
“So, what’s the reason?”
“A lot! I’ve read a book called <Steel’s Fever> before. The scene where the character dies was very impressive.”
“The death scene?”
“Yes, when the subordinate general died, the main character and his party rather held a festival rather than being sad.” You know when you’re laughing loudly and beating the drum, and tears suddenly pour out?”
“You cried? Ha Neul?”
“I told you so.”
Kim Ha Neul looked up at the ceiling as if he remembered that time. Seeing the corners of his mouth roll up, it must have been a very precious memory.
“Was it your favorite character?”
“Not at all. I didn’t even have that idea at the time. Should I just say that the heart of the protagonist who sends his colleagues was conveyed desperately? Wow. People who haven’t experienced this in person don’t know.”
Kim Ha Neul even exclaims.
Kang Ba Da, which was so cute, raised its corners of mouth without realizing it. I like the innocent side that I see sometimes.
“Anyway, that’s when I felt the power of fiction for the first time. Since then, I have thought that I want to write something that can move other people’s minds.”
“Then you’ve already achieved your dream?”
“Well, that’s still a long way off.”
“It’s the best paid song”.
“It’s not like that.”
Kim Ha Neul shook his head firmly and began to explain. He said that his emotions are different now from the days of the book, and that he wants to write a long story someday.
While the explanation continued, Kang Ba Da looked at him with a happy expression. It’s a little weird, but a man with a dream is this cool.
“You haven’t received your first payment yet, have you?”
“Well, come to think of it, it’s time to come in soon.” How did you know?”
“I searched it once before!”
The truth is I’m the de facto owner of your management and I never get regular reports of the situation of your writers.
Kim Ha Neul is quick to sense in strange places, so Kang Ba Da quickly turned to prevent him from digging further.
“What are you going to do when you get the payment?”
“I have something in mind.”
“Oh, what’s that?”
Kim Ha Neul smiled mischievously as she looked at Kang Ba Da. He seems to have something in mind.
“You’ll tell me later, right?”
“Of course. I’ll let Ba Da know first.”
“Did you promise?”
“Yes, I promise.”
Kim Ha Neul suddenly stuck out her pinky finger. Kang Ba Da, who was staring at it, soon swallowed his laughter and walked his fingers face to face.
* * *
“…I’m in big trouble.”
After a pleasant conversation, we lay down on our own blankets. Nevertheless, I could hardly fall asleep.
It was originally insomnia, but I couldn’t sleep because I was nervous listening to the sound of breathing in Kang Ba Da that was right in front of my nose.
“Let’s meditate instead.”
Let’s close our eyes and listen to the sounds of nature as taught by the hospital. If you empty your mind while meditating like this, you’ll fall asleep…
What a bloody day it is it?
It rained outside due to unseasonable bad weather. If you’re bored, you can even thunder, so quiet meditation is gone.
“…I can’t sleep peacefully.”
I have no choice but to do it with the mind of being on a night watch. Thinking like that makes me sleepy for some reason. The human body is really amazing.
(Singing “Quack, boom!
By this point, the thunder that rings as if to break the sky was not bad. Like nature-friendly heavy metal music, the strange sense of beat stabilizes the mind and body.
“Ha, Ha Neul?”
Kang Ba Da burst into conversation.
It was an ambiguous atmosphere to answer immediately, so I pretended to sleep, but suddenly I felt her turning toward me.
“Are you sleeping?”
At that moment, lightning struck, and the face of Kang Ba Da came into my sight as I was squinting.
It was difficult to recognize clearly because there were no glasses, but what I could tell instinctively was. It was the fact that she was very frightened.
The first question that came to mind was this. Why is Kang Ba Da scared now. Is it because you’re alone with a man?
It doesn’t make sense just thinking about the pleasant conversations we had until the last minute. If he did, he would have avoided the situation itself.
(Singing “Quack, boom!
Then lightning struck again. Then Kang Ba Da flinched noticeably. Then I realized what she was afraid of.
I figured out why, but the question deepened. She’s not old enough to be afraid of thunder, she’s even a geoscience major.
But for now, the priority was to calm Kang Ba Da rather than to find the answer to the question. I looked at Kang Ba Da and said,
“Are you okay?”
“Oh, I don’t think so.”
“What should I do for you?”
a sea of silent rivers
However, when the thunder struck, he flinched and trembled again. At the sight, I held her hand for now.
Through her skin, I could clearly feel how frightened she was. I reassured her with a light strain on my hand.
“Calm down for now.”
It was a Kang Ba Da that tried to answer, but his body was honest. The tremor was unstoppable, and the body shrank like a frightened child.
If it was a problem that could be solved with just one word to calm down, there is no way that a self-respecting woman would show me this.
Is it because of kidnapping?’
Previously, when I couldn’t get a call because I was sleeping, I remembered Kang Ba Da, which was extremely anxious and tried to send a security team.
I didn’t ask you because approaching trauma is also a cautious thing for professionals. If it has anything to do with the weather now.
He could have been kidnapped in this weather.’
Due to the nature of Kang Ba Da, which does not want to lose, he may have chosen earth science to overcome his trauma.
‘Well, I don’t care about that.’
The important thing is that Kang Ba Da is scared. That alone blew all my thoughts away, and I only thought of a way to reassure her.
“…Ha Neul ssi!?”
Kang Ba Da uttered a little startled voice. Because I hugged her willingly.
Originally, humans secrete “oxytocin” when other people’s skin touches them. This hormone slows down the heartbeat and greatly reduces stress and anxiety. This is the only way to work right now.
“Is this okay?”
Instead of answering, Kang Ba Da hugged me. I could feel the tremor gradually subsiding.
Of course, when lightning struck, her body was up and down, but it gradually subsided. The temporary measures seem to have worked better than I thought.
You look like a baby.’
When the situation calmed down to some extent, instinct began to creep out.
The scent of her shampoo and the touch of her soft skin, and the hot breath that touched her every time she chewed, paralyzed her reason.
I’m a little sorry for Kang Ba Da, but later I felt cute even when she flinched, so I didn’t want the thunder to stop.
It was near instinct that I stroked the head of Kang Ba Da. The texture of the hair, which is still hydrated, was very good.
Then I suddenly came to my senses.
At that moment, Kang Tae-yang’s voice passed by in my head.
– Keep your sympathy. If you don’t, you’ll die.
I got goosebumps for a moment.
I didn’t think that far as the situation was, but somehow Kang Tae-yang’s warning kept floating in my head, so I carefully pulled out.
No, it was time to.
Kang Ba Da gave strength to the hand that held me.
“Ba Da ssi?”
Kang Ba Da did not answer.
But I understand what she wants in the circumstances.
I don’t know anymore.’
I don’t care how it comes to an end.
The reason that reached the limit stopped working. Thanks to this, I hugged her and stroked her hair over and over again.
Thunder continued that night.
My insomnia has hardly subsided either.